Sunday, October 20, 2013

Cute Haircut but... Goodbye Satan (It's Never Too Late to Fire a Partner No matter How Much Time You Think You Invested)

Cute Haircut but... Goodbye Satan (It's Never Too Late to Fire a Partner No matter How Much Time You Think You Invested)

Perhaps calling your partner “satan” is a little harsh , not inaccurate just  a little extreme to say out loud to other people but internally when you realize that your partner truly has bad intentions it kind of feels good to say to oneself, ”Goddamn it, I’ve been working with satin, no wonder my life stucks, what a dick.”
If you’re a great person, and have great intentions, and on top of all that you’re a great artist, or professional in your field, you will attract these blood sucking partners who will secretly sabotage your good efforts. I don’t care if you’re child hood friends, or you’ve been “writing” partners for 8 years, or for 2 months or two hours, or they have such great credits it’s gonna really advance your career to develop a project with them, or their your agent or manager who just “knows best” If that person I’m talking about makes your stomach feel icky after you read their emails, or their comments to you are digs at your integrity or work but are artfully covered up with their “sound advice.”  Really take a look at what stats they have – what products have they actually delivered to you to help advance your career, and that stat is usually zero or close to zero.  But you have gone to great lengths to  help the project you have with them – and they come back with invalidating comments and criticisms, and you seem to be carrying all the weight, but their opinion is very important, because of their big Hollywood credits. Fuck them. If they haven’t helped you yet, they most likely won’t help you now or ever.  It usually takes quite a bit of effort to get to do one small thing for you. Someone who is critical of others has a terrible ability to asess situations accurately.   Yet, they act like they know everything, and enforce on you that they know best, but why?  What make them know best?  A great partner, is not someone with that kind of attitide.   A successful person only offers advice when asked, and usually have a disclaimer of,  “This is just my experience but…” They will tell you if they can help you or if they can’t help.   A partner who is dead weight, is one that stops things from happening.  They squash you, your project, or beingness, your willing to help, and your capabilities.   Not everyone has a ton of credits, and not every person who has a ton of credits can do anything for you.   If they are not helpful, they are not helpful.  I have seen movies happen, with one guy, who is a director, and writer, and has never done anything, but he was so driven to get his movie done so he did, he didn’t have any fancy partners on baord.   In the same token I’ve seen producers with the hugest names on board their project and no one will touch it.   That is why it’s very valuable to make sure your team is effective and good and there are no bad seeds in there. It takes one bad seed to stop a project from moving forward.   Just one.   You are better off with a very able person who can pick up the phone, be charming, and likeable, and cold call a company to get a meeting.  People like great people.   People want to work with people who are easy to work with, who are nice and respectful who have a good work ethic.

So when you realize that your writing partner, or business partner, or life partner is squashing your ability to produce, and you fee introverted a lot. It’s time to jump ship.   Some ships are easier to jump than others.   But if this someone is emailing you passive aggressive jabbing emails, and you keep catching them in lies.  His intentions are bad.  If they were valuable you will know, because if you tell him off, he would appogiz and try and take action to make it right. But if their intentions are bad, it’s ALWAYS ALL YOUR FAULT NO MATTER WHAT. And those people are the deadliest ones to have around because they will find all manner to spin the situation around to be your fault.  You cannot get around this.   They will not take responsibilities for their actions and their  intentions are never for the best of the group, it is solely for themselves, and they do not have your best interest in hand.   If all this sounds too familiar than you have one in your court, and the only thing to do is fire the fucker.  There is no scarcity of great people, or great ideas, these blood suckers only make you think you need them but you don’t.  I had to get rid a writing partner that I had been working on and off with for 8 years.  He had great credits.  He did nothing for the past 8 years to help bring our two scripts into fruition with all his big connections, and his big advice, all I did was help him get more writing jobs.  His opinions were very important and he always knew best.  The one time he seemingly found a source to fund our project, I knew the person, and also knew that person had no stats in the area, and had a track record of being very unstable, and created many snarled up situations.  I knew that if I directly went to this source I would for one, find that this person was lying about their funding, and that two, they would react violently and would go buzzerk for being asked a direct question of “So do you have the funds”.  This was exactly what happened.   One does get violently defensive when they are caught in a lie.   And in reality who wants to work with someone psychotic and unstable even if they did have a little cash to spend on a movie?  I have gone down that path. It sucks.  I don’t want to work with someone insane whether they have the money or not, the whole process would be hell, and that’s not why I got into Hollywood, though it is fun to write about it and joke about it as comic but has cost me a lot of tears in the process.  So when I reported back the situation to the “I know best” partner,  all I got back were passive aggressive communication full of generialized lies – anger, criticsm,  inaccurate accusations, in an attempt to pound me into submission to do as he says.  I saw that when this partner was confronted with truth, in a friendly manner,  the above was what I got in return.  It was time to fire him.  I wrote back.  “I have a good idea. Let’s throw our scripts in the bin, and part ways.”   
You can always write another script.  There no scarcity of awesome ideas out there.  You can’t throw your soul in the bin, it makes for a very unpleasant life.

Love Camille. 

Saturday, October 5, 2013

A Bag of Crazy

This Just In... She’s a Bag of Crazy

I actually couldn’t decide which blog I should direct this post to my Glaminlalaland blog ( The practical guide for the fashionable broke femme, or Camille’s Hollywood Etiquette – Navigating the shark tank. 

But I realize, it’s the first post that belongs to both…  So here it goes.

I was explaining to my writing partner yesterday that I was working with this person, on a project for about a year, and I noticed more often than not there was a black cloud looming over us. (yes this is metaphorical) and I also noticed that this person also wanted a bite of whatever I was eating (also metaphorical).   I also noticed that this person has no real stats in their career,  but loved to chat about the importance of positivity, and yet her (I mean him, okay her).  She would invite me to trips to going to tops of mountains to mantra goals, and I would say, “Why do you need to mantra goals, when you could decide to do something and do it, in the comfort of your own home. "

Her mere presence gave me anxiety.  

I noticed my dog didn’t liker her, and in fact, she hated dogs (also a red flag) I found myself doing many things, to help this person, letting them jump on the gravy train, (or at least the train that leaded to gravy).   And then when it was time for all the hard work to pay off, this person got um, fucking weird.   She stopped communicating, until finally I confronted her and said, “What the hell is going on?”   And the response was something like this.

 “Well I was talking to my new psychiatrist I met in a two  hour hot yoga class, and we went out for Chai tea, and I was telling him all about my career (what career?) and he told me the best thing to do to find the right answer in life, is to cut communication with the world and sit home and introvert, and then the answer will come, and then I crossed checked this with my therapist from oversees, and she agreed, so I decided to quit the business and concentrate on my true passion of working at a petting zoo. “

And my response internally was like, oh thank you for letting me know…

You’re a bag of crazy.

Guys, don’t be a victim of this,  spot the early signs and direct these people to closest petting zoo, for you, for them, and for society.